I have heard and seen a lot over the last couple of years about how America is changing for the worse, how people miss the "Old America" and want her back, and this lead me to think-just what exactly is the "Old America"?
Is the Old America the isolationist, "stay out of things come hell or high water" America? Is it the racist, bigoted, sexist America? I am sure if I asked a sampling of 100 people, I would get 100 different answers, because the truth is, what constitutes the "Old America" depends on the one answering.
We ALL have our own idea of what America should be. We ALL have our own interpretation of what America was. And we ALL have our own ideas about what America is becoming. So which ones are right? Which ones are wrong? I don't know.
I have my own ideas and interpretations and they are formed by my past, by my upbringing, and they are also changing daily based on my growth and maturation (no comment from the peanut gallery). Some of it is very conservative and some of it (more often these days) is more liberal. I tend to consider myself more Libertarian than Liberal or Conservative. I also tend to me more fiscally conservative and more socially liberal and this gets me into all kinds or disagreement and trouble with friends and family. And all that factors into and colors what I call the Old America and how I see America turning into.
The reality is... the "Old America" is a myth. It was never as great or as bad as we remember it. What we are really saying when we either speak highly or lowly about it, is giving our idea of what we think America should be.
But I have to remind myself that I alone am not America, I am part of it but I am not all of it and just my ideas and interpretations are just that.. a part of it, I don't have the right to decide and determine those things for others. I have the right to speak my mind but not to make someone else follow them. The Conservatives amongst us who decry what America is becoming (take your pick.. morally corrupt, socialist, communist, etc..) and that the Old America was better and more righteous also don't have the right to force that on those who disagree. The Liberals amongst us who decry what America used to be in the past and how we need to do this or that to move into the 21st Century and become more Global don't get to force that on those who disagree with them. We must all learn to communicate and more importantly cooperate to form the America of the future. One where neither side gets it's complete way, one where neither side is necessarily completely happy, and one where both sides have to give up some things they want.
The truth is that America is constantly growing and evolving (oops, I said the "E" word, hope the Christian Taliban don't come after me..lol). Our population is changing and evolving and this naturally is going to lead to change and progress and adaptation. This means it will NEVER be the Old America however you define it, it will always be the New America. It won't always be pretty, it will be full of mistakes and missteps. And we will learn and grow. And yes, some of what we have enjoyed or done in the past will go away, some of it good and some of it bad.
I don't know if it will grow worse or better, I don't know if it will be more "free" or more "restricted". I don't know if it will be more capitalist or more socialist. I do know that it will be whatever we make of it. And we can either continue to act like Junior High and High schoolers who insult and fight and "take our balls and pout" when we don't get our way, OR we can be adults who sit down and listen to each other and compromise to try and make the best America we can.
I don't know about the rest of you reading this, but however it turns out I would prefer it be directed and produced by adults than by children.
Thursday, May 29, 2014
Wednesday, May 28, 2014
Why do we have to say negative things when people pass away?
I awoke to the news of the passing away of Maya Angelou. Now, in the interest of full disclosure, I was never a big fan of hers (never against her either) and never read much of what she wrote, but I also had nothing against her, she just wasn't in the my realm of interest. And for that I feel that I will probably be sorry and playing catch up for the rest of my life. However, I do know she had a HUGE following and she touched many people. She could also rub many people the wrong way but isn't that always the case when someone feels strongly about a subject and speaks on it?
Anyway, most of what I have read of her and about her have been positive and glowing. She spoke of a situation and time (being black in American and the civil rights struggles) that to this day still stir up people's passions and guilt even. But she was honest in what she felt and wrote and that is all we can ask of anyone is honesty.
However, after seeing many reports and posts about her after her passing today, I am discouraged by some of what I have seen. While most is positive and affirming, there are also plenty of snide comments and innuendo about eccentricities and peculiarities she may or may not have had. Now, most of this is my fault for it comes from people and places that I frequent or had in the past anyway and I can't judge their intentions although I have my suspicions. I also won't single anyone or anyplace out, just that it disturbs me that we do this kind of stuff.
We ALL have peculiarities and eccentricities that others may find strange or even alarming. That doesn't make us bad people, just human. And outside of being truly evil (such as Stalin, Hitler, the KKK, etc) to bring any of it up after one passes away just strikes me as wrong and misguided. Why can't we just celebrate the life the lived and their accomplishments. Remember how they touched us and spoke truth to us that we may not have faced otherwise?
Why do we have to bring up the negatives and make snide comments? I am not saying we should whitewash anything, or cover anything up but outside of something egregious, when a life has ended, we should focus on the positives and light they brought instead of the negatives. Bringing up the negatives does no one any good anyway, it just continues a cycle of hate and jealousy.
Now this may make me a "flaming heart" liberal, but is that such a bad thing at times? Maybe if we ALL had a little more heart we might find a little more peace in ourselves and the world. But then again maybe that is just a hopeless pipe dream. I choose to cling to the hopeless pipe dream.
RIP Ms. Angelou, the world has gone a little darker today with the passing of the light of your soul. It is up to the rest of us to shine a little brighter to make up for it.
Anyway, most of what I have read of her and about her have been positive and glowing. She spoke of a situation and time (being black in American and the civil rights struggles) that to this day still stir up people's passions and guilt even. But she was honest in what she felt and wrote and that is all we can ask of anyone is honesty.
However, after seeing many reports and posts about her after her passing today, I am discouraged by some of what I have seen. While most is positive and affirming, there are also plenty of snide comments and innuendo about eccentricities and peculiarities she may or may not have had. Now, most of this is my fault for it comes from people and places that I frequent or had in the past anyway and I can't judge their intentions although I have my suspicions. I also won't single anyone or anyplace out, just that it disturbs me that we do this kind of stuff.
We ALL have peculiarities and eccentricities that others may find strange or even alarming. That doesn't make us bad people, just human. And outside of being truly evil (such as Stalin, Hitler, the KKK, etc) to bring any of it up after one passes away just strikes me as wrong and misguided. Why can't we just celebrate the life the lived and their accomplishments. Remember how they touched us and spoke truth to us that we may not have faced otherwise?
Why do we have to bring up the negatives and make snide comments? I am not saying we should whitewash anything, or cover anything up but outside of something egregious, when a life has ended, we should focus on the positives and light they brought instead of the negatives. Bringing up the negatives does no one any good anyway, it just continues a cycle of hate and jealousy.
Now this may make me a "flaming heart" liberal, but is that such a bad thing at times? Maybe if we ALL had a little more heart we might find a little more peace in ourselves and the world. But then again maybe that is just a hopeless pipe dream. I choose to cling to the hopeless pipe dream.
RIP Ms. Angelou, the world has gone a little darker today with the passing of the light of your soul. It is up to the rest of us to shine a little brighter to make up for it.
Tuesday, May 27, 2014
Prejudice-The Cancer of the Heart
As stated in previous posts, I have recently been re-examining myself, both internal and external. I used to be like most in that I was happy with who and how I was and saw no problems or dichotomy in my speech and my actual behavior. I would claim I believed in equality and acceptance but the actual working out of that in my behavior was something different. But recent events have caused a rethinking.
As also stated previously, one of those events was a good friend disclosing to me that he was Gay. Where previously I had never given any prejudice in this area much thought, this caused me to give it deeper consideration. Before I had always felt I treated people equally regardless of their sexual orientation, I was still "weirded out" by the very thought of LGBT relationships and behavior. If I am being honest, I still am but instead of just ignoring it, I am actively trying to break that prejudice. Having a good friend that is gay, I want to understand him and his life. It is easy to ignore any prejudices when they don't touch your life in any way, but when they intrude (and they always will in one form or another) we must rethink them and ourselves.
A similar instance dealt with racism. This was caused my a recent book I read (a brief book review will be posted eventually)-"Natchez Burning" by Greg Iles. It deals with hate crimes during the Civil Rights struggles of the 1960's and the lasting repercussions that are still around today. This has caused me to learn more about this time and also to re-evaluate my own feelings on race. I was lucky enough to be born after those times and to grow up in a relative equality period. I haven't had to see or go through such instances and I consider myself lucky in that respect. But again, being honest I still have ingrained prejudices against those not like me (be they black, hispanic, or asian).
I fear we haven't really solved the prejudice issue (be it racism or homophobic or whatever) we have just driven it deeper and more hidden. The only way to truly deal with it and eradicate it, is to admit it and work through it. We have been successful at hiding it but it is still there smoldering and festering.
Recently Mark Cuban had an interview where he admitted that he has prejudices and the response I have seen ranges all over the map. But most of it, takes him to task for admitting it. I personally, am glad to see him admit it.. I wish we would all admit that we have them, instead of denying it and hiding it. For only when we admit it can we begin to cure it. If we would all be honest with ourselves, we would all admit that we ALL have prejudice. Some of it racist in nature, some of it is sexual in nature, some of it is morally in nature, but it is there. And most of us are well trained and adept at rationalizing it and explaining it away, but it is NEVER right to not respect one another or treat one another equally.
It is never a bad thing to admit and acknowledge we have prejudices, it can only be overcome and defeated if brought out into the light. Just like cancer does with our cells, if left alone and denied prejudice will slowly take over and eat us alive from the inside out. It will cause a tumor of the heart and soul until it explodes and kill us. It will take the "chemotherapy" of acknowledgement and the treatment of honesty and respect for each other to cure this. Instead of sweeping it under the rug and denying it is still there, we need to be honest with each other and most importantly with ourselves.
It is never a bad thing to admit and acknowledge we have prejudices, it can only be overcome and defeated if brought out into the light. Just like cancer does with our cells, if left alone and denied prejudice will slowly take over and eat us alive from the inside out. It will cause a tumor of the heart and soul until it explodes and kill us. It will take the "chemotherapy" of acknowledgement and the treatment of honesty and respect for each other to cure this. Instead of sweeping it under the rug and denying it is still there, we need to be honest with each other and most importantly with ourselves.
Monday, May 26, 2014
Memorial Day-Thank You to ALL who have served
Today is Memorial Day, a day that is more often viewed as a 3 day weekend from work, where the focus is put on camping, or having cook outs and parties. But in reality the day holds more meaning that we tend to bestow on today. It is a day where we who are lucky to live in the Untied States, owe our respect and remembrance to ALL those who have served our nation and us.
Memorial day got it's official start in 1868 when Maj. Gen John Logan, the head of the Union Veterans of the Civil War established Decoration Day as a time for the nation to decorate the graves of fallen soldiers. Similar services had happened in various cities in both North and South years before but those were not considered official. Many cities claim to be the birthplace of this holiday, approximately 25 most in the South. However, in 1966 President Lyndon B. Johnson declared Waterloo, N.Y. to be the "Official" birthplace of the holiday. A specific date was not established at this time, but by the end of the 19th century it was most often celebrated on May 30th.
While at that time it was mainly for the soldiers from the Civil War, it was after World War 1 that the holiday was expanded to include all those who had died serving the country in ALL the wars involving America. And in 1971 Congress made it an official Federal Holiday.
I for one am proud to honor and remember all those who gave their all to defend this country and her citizens. There is no greater honor than one can bestow than to lay down their lives for the fellow man, and NO ONE does that better than the American Soldier. They have kept us free for 240 years now and still going strong.
I am proud and honored to have served myself and consider all those who have served and continue to serve to be my brothers and sisters. I could't ask for a better, more honorable, more loyal family than my fellow veterans. All of us who have served don't ask for special treatment, and we certainly don't consider ourselves heroes. The only heroes are those who never made it home. Those are the ones we remember and honor.
So, by all means go camping, get together and cook out, have parties.. but please, take at least few moments this weekend and remember what was sacrificed to make it all possible. None of those heroes would ask or expect you to stop such activities or feel guilty for enjoying them, in fact they would probably curse you up a blue streak and kick your arses for even thinking it. They would tell you that is the very reason they served and have their all. We just owe it to them to take a few moments and silently remember them.
Memorial day got it's official start in 1868 when Maj. Gen John Logan, the head of the Union Veterans of the Civil War established Decoration Day as a time for the nation to decorate the graves of fallen soldiers. Similar services had happened in various cities in both North and South years before but those were not considered official. Many cities claim to be the birthplace of this holiday, approximately 25 most in the South. However, in 1966 President Lyndon B. Johnson declared Waterloo, N.Y. to be the "Official" birthplace of the holiday. A specific date was not established at this time, but by the end of the 19th century it was most often celebrated on May 30th.
While at that time it was mainly for the soldiers from the Civil War, it was after World War 1 that the holiday was expanded to include all those who had died serving the country in ALL the wars involving America. And in 1971 Congress made it an official Federal Holiday.
I for one am proud to honor and remember all those who gave their all to defend this country and her citizens. There is no greater honor than one can bestow than to lay down their lives for the fellow man, and NO ONE does that better than the American Soldier. They have kept us free for 240 years now and still going strong.
I am proud and honored to have served myself and consider all those who have served and continue to serve to be my brothers and sisters. I could't ask for a better, more honorable, more loyal family than my fellow veterans. All of us who have served don't ask for special treatment, and we certainly don't consider ourselves heroes. The only heroes are those who never made it home. Those are the ones we remember and honor.
So, by all means go camping, get together and cook out, have parties.. but please, take at least few moments this weekend and remember what was sacrificed to make it all possible. None of those heroes would ask or expect you to stop such activities or feel guilty for enjoying them, in fact they would probably curse you up a blue streak and kick your arses for even thinking it. They would tell you that is the very reason they served and have their all. We just owe it to them to take a few moments and silently remember them.
Sunday, May 25, 2014
Today-May 25th in History
Today's post will just be a list of some of the things that have happened on this day in History
-240 BC First recorded Perehelion passage of Halley's Comet
-1521 Martin Luther declared an outlaw by the Edict of Worms
-1878 Gilbert and Sullivan's Comic Opera "H.M.S Pinafore" opens in London
-1925 John T. Scopes is indicted for teaching Evolution
-1961 Before Congress JFK made a speech declaring his goal to "put a man on the moon" within the decade, thus launching the Apollo Program
-1966 Explorer 32 launched
-1968 The Gateway Arch in St. Louis is dedicated
-1977 "Star Wars is releases in Theatres
-1986 Hands Across America takes place
-2008 NASA'a Phoenix lander lands on Mars
-2011 The last episode of The Oprah Winfrey show airs
-240 BC First recorded Perehelion passage of Halley's Comet
-1521 Martin Luther declared an outlaw by the Edict of Worms
-1878 Gilbert and Sullivan's Comic Opera "H.M.S Pinafore" opens in London
-1925 John T. Scopes is indicted for teaching Evolution
-1961 Before Congress JFK made a speech declaring his goal to "put a man on the moon" within the decade, thus launching the Apollo Program
-1966 Explorer 32 launched
-1968 The Gateway Arch in St. Louis is dedicated
-1977 "Star Wars is releases in Theatres
-1986 Hands Across America takes place
-2008 NASA'a Phoenix lander lands on Mars
-2011 The last episode of The Oprah Winfrey show airs
Saturday, May 24, 2014
Soul Searching Saturday 2.0
Today...May 24th in History:
-1218 The 5th Crusade leaves Europe
-1607 100 setters leaves their ships to land in Jamestown
-1626 Peter Minuit buys Manhattan
-1738 John Wesley is converted, essentially launching the Methodist movement
-1844 Samuel Morse sends his first message over telegraph
-1856 John Brown kills 5 pro-slavery settlers in Kansas
-1853 The Brooklyn Bridge officially opens
-1935 The first night game in MLB, when Cincinnati beats Philadelphia 2-1
-1941 The Bismarck sinks the Hood
-1943 Joseph Mengele becomes Chief Medical Office of Auschwitz
-1961 Freedom Riders are arrested in Jackson, MS
-1962 Scott Carpenter orbits Earth 3 times in the Aurora 7 capsule
In the attempt to better myself and make myself not as big an asshole as I usually am, I have been doing a lot of thinking, examining and soul searching. I have re-examined a lot of what I used to take for granted and beliefs I used to hold and accept without questioning. Part of that has led to the new belief that ALL beliefs should be regularly questioned and rethought, for that is only how we can improve ourselves and grow.
Another thing to come out of all that is my stance on the death penalty. For all my life up until recently I have blindly held to the rightness of the death penalty. I have operated under the assumption that, when you take a life you forfeit your right to your own. That lead to acceptance of the death penalty and it's rightness. However, I can no longer hold to that as I once did.
First off, just the basic fact that I am NOT God and I have no right to decide who lives and who dies. Regardless of the reason for making that decision. I do not condone those who take the lives of others, but just as they don't have that right, neither do I. Just because they choose to make that determination does not give me the right to do it as well. I am not God, I did not create life and I DO NOT have the right to take it... EVER. I also do not have the right to choose people to do that for me, I do not have the right to pass the responsibility on to anyone else either (specifically a judge, jury or the legal system). NONE of us has the right.
Secondly, I also cannot be Pro-Life when it comes to abortion (which I staunchly am, sorry if that offends anyone) and yet also hold to the rightness of the death penalty. I cannot with a clear conscience say I am Pro-Life (for any reason) and yet also hold the belief that taking a life (even a murderer or rapist) is condoned in a different context. I admit the contexts are different, but life is life and again, I DO NOT have the right to take a life, for ANY reason.
I do not speak for anyone other than myself, and while I may disagree with someone on their personal stances of such issues, I also do not condemn them for having them. Most hold those views for their own reasons and I respect that, I just could not continue with that dichotomy in myself. Thanks for letting me ramble and unburden myself. Back to your regularly scheduled Saturday.
-1218 The 5th Crusade leaves Europe
-1607 100 setters leaves their ships to land in Jamestown
-1626 Peter Minuit buys Manhattan
-1738 John Wesley is converted, essentially launching the Methodist movement
-1844 Samuel Morse sends his first message over telegraph
-1856 John Brown kills 5 pro-slavery settlers in Kansas
-1853 The Brooklyn Bridge officially opens
-1935 The first night game in MLB, when Cincinnati beats Philadelphia 2-1
-1941 The Bismarck sinks the Hood
-1943 Joseph Mengele becomes Chief Medical Office of Auschwitz
-1961 Freedom Riders are arrested in Jackson, MS
-1962 Scott Carpenter orbits Earth 3 times in the Aurora 7 capsule
In the attempt to better myself and make myself not as big an asshole as I usually am, I have been doing a lot of thinking, examining and soul searching. I have re-examined a lot of what I used to take for granted and beliefs I used to hold and accept without questioning. Part of that has led to the new belief that ALL beliefs should be regularly questioned and rethought, for that is only how we can improve ourselves and grow.
Another thing to come out of all that is my stance on the death penalty. For all my life up until recently I have blindly held to the rightness of the death penalty. I have operated under the assumption that, when you take a life you forfeit your right to your own. That lead to acceptance of the death penalty and it's rightness. However, I can no longer hold to that as I once did.
First off, just the basic fact that I am NOT God and I have no right to decide who lives and who dies. Regardless of the reason for making that decision. I do not condone those who take the lives of others, but just as they don't have that right, neither do I. Just because they choose to make that determination does not give me the right to do it as well. I am not God, I did not create life and I DO NOT have the right to take it... EVER. I also do not have the right to choose people to do that for me, I do not have the right to pass the responsibility on to anyone else either (specifically a judge, jury or the legal system). NONE of us has the right.
Secondly, I also cannot be Pro-Life when it comes to abortion (which I staunchly am, sorry if that offends anyone) and yet also hold to the rightness of the death penalty. I cannot with a clear conscience say I am Pro-Life (for any reason) and yet also hold the belief that taking a life (even a murderer or rapist) is condoned in a different context. I admit the contexts are different, but life is life and again, I DO NOT have the right to take a life, for ANY reason.
I do not speak for anyone other than myself, and while I may disagree with someone on their personal stances of such issues, I also do not condemn them for having them. Most hold those views for their own reasons and I respect that, I just could not continue with that dichotomy in myself. Thanks for letting me ramble and unburden myself. Back to your regularly scheduled Saturday.
Friday, May 23, 2014
Fun Friday
I don't have anything prepared today, so just a little fun potpourri....
Today-May 23rd in History:
-1533 The Marriage of Henry VIII and Catharine of Aragon is annulled
-1701 William Kidd accused of Piracy is hung in London
-1788 South Carolina becomes the 8th US State (and US history is never the same thanks to those trouble makers..lol)
-1873 The Royal Canadian Mounted Police gets it's genesis
-1934 Bonnie and Clyde are ambushed and killed
-1945 While in US Custody Heinrich Himmler commits suicide (and the world is less one evil)
-1995 The first version of JAVA is released
And for the fun part... here is the EPIC Drum Battle between Will Ferrell and Chad Smith on the Tonight Show
EPIC Drum Battle between Will Ferrell and Chad Smith
Today-May 23rd in History:
-1533 The Marriage of Henry VIII and Catharine of Aragon is annulled
-1701 William Kidd accused of Piracy is hung in London
-1788 South Carolina becomes the 8th US State (and US history is never the same thanks to those trouble makers..lol)
-1873 The Royal Canadian Mounted Police gets it's genesis
-1934 Bonnie and Clyde are ambushed and killed
-1945 While in US Custody Heinrich Himmler commits suicide (and the world is less one evil)
-1995 The first version of JAVA is released
And for the fun part... here is the EPIC Drum Battle between Will Ferrell and Chad Smith on the Tonight Show
EPIC Drum Battle between Will Ferrell and Chad Smith
Thursday, May 22, 2014
The Southern Way Part 1
In a new addition to the Blog... I will try each day to at least post a few historical things that happened each day...
Today May 22nd_
-1807 Aaron Burr indicted on charges of Treason
-1826 HMS Beagle departs on 1st voyage
-1956=Preston Brooks (SC) beats Charles Sumner (Mass) with a cane in the Senate
-1906 Wright Brothers awarded Patent #821.393 for their "Flying Machine"
-1968 USS Scorpion disappears
-1980 Namco releases "Pac Man"
-1992 Johnny Carson hosts his last "Tonight Show"
-2002 a Birmingham, AL jury convicts former KKK member Bobby Frank Cherry of the 1963 murders of 4 girls in the bombing of the 16th street church.
-2011 Joplin Tornado
This post is just the 1st part of what I hope to make a regular part of the blog, a take on being from the South.
I am a proud Southerner, I take immense pride in the fact that I am from the South. I love her and her people. But I also am not blind or ignorant to her past mistakes and failures. We must face them, acknowledge them, and move to correct them and ensure they are never repeated. But this has to be done by ourselves, it cannot and should not be done by any outsiders.
Southerners are proud people, fiercely proud of our heritage and our ancestors. We are also fiercely loyal, stubborn, and once set in our way, not even a hurricane can move us. Right or wrong these facts will always trump just about anything else. We are raised that way, to honor and protect family (this includes not just immediate family but extended family, close friends, even to community) above all. This is part of the reason for the Civil War, it is something that outsiders (especially Northerners) can never understand.
I personally believe this is (at least) partly a by product of our Scotch-Irish ancestry. Now I understand not all Southerners are Scotch-Irish but the main backbone of the South is Scotch-Irish. And this is a natural outgrowth from their shared Celtic Tribal/Clan culture. In that heritage, the Tribe (and eventually Clan) came first. You owed your first loyalty to that group and that was carried over when they settled this country. This was a steel part of out soul long before our ancestors came over and it always will be. This is why we identify more with where we grow up more than those from the North do. This is why during the Civil War, Southerners tended to side with the South and more importantly their State over the United States.. over the Union.
We Southerners can and will always fix our errors without outside help, BUT we often do not fix them fast enough, much to our lasting regret and sorrow. We also MUST fix them on our own, any outsiders CANNOT do it for us. I am not saying they should't necessarily try (that is a debate for a different day) but that it won't do any good. All it does is cause us to "bow up" our backs and circle the war wagons. It is viewed as intrusion and interference by outsiders and will ALWAYS cause us to "close up the shop". We must work through them on our own, we only hope that we learn from past mistakes and learn to recognize them sooner and fix them before too much damage is done.
This next part will generate much debate (from all 3 of you that read it that is...lol) but it is my opinion. Part of the reason we had to go through the Civil Rights struggle was because of the Civil War. It is my contention (and I have no facts or basis for this other than my own opinion) that we would have eventually recognized the evils of slavery and ended that horrible blot on our past, but in our own way and on our own time. Please don't construe that statement as condoning it, it is not and it should have ended sooner than it did and as far slavery is concerned is a good thing the war happened and it ended. I just mean that while it ended slavery itself, it did not end the reasons behind it and out of that grew the Civil Rights struggles and evil of the 1900's. I do feel that if we had been allowed to work through it and ended it on our own, then we could have avoided a lot of what went down in the 50's and 60's. It would not have prevented all of it because their is evil out there and there always will be, but we could have avoided some of it.
Of course, such evil as slavery and racism can never be overcome without struggle and pain. Much of it is necessary, for it must be punished and eradicated and just like cancer our other diseases, that is not done without pain and struggle.
Anyway, this is only part 1 and I have rambled on long enough and probably stirred up enough problems so I will end Part 1 here. I just wanted to say that right or wrong, being such a proud, loyal, stubborn people there are some things we HAVE to work through ourselves. Even with all the sin and evil and errors of our past, I am still and ALWAYS will be a proud Southerner.
Today May 22nd_
-1807 Aaron Burr indicted on charges of Treason
-1826 HMS Beagle departs on 1st voyage
-1956=Preston Brooks (SC) beats Charles Sumner (Mass) with a cane in the Senate
-1906 Wright Brothers awarded Patent #821.393 for their "Flying Machine"
-1968 USS Scorpion disappears
-1980 Namco releases "Pac Man"
-1992 Johnny Carson hosts his last "Tonight Show"
-2002 a Birmingham, AL jury convicts former KKK member Bobby Frank Cherry of the 1963 murders of 4 girls in the bombing of the 16th street church.
-2011 Joplin Tornado
This post is just the 1st part of what I hope to make a regular part of the blog, a take on being from the South.
I am a proud Southerner, I take immense pride in the fact that I am from the South. I love her and her people. But I also am not blind or ignorant to her past mistakes and failures. We must face them, acknowledge them, and move to correct them and ensure they are never repeated. But this has to be done by ourselves, it cannot and should not be done by any outsiders.
Southerners are proud people, fiercely proud of our heritage and our ancestors. We are also fiercely loyal, stubborn, and once set in our way, not even a hurricane can move us. Right or wrong these facts will always trump just about anything else. We are raised that way, to honor and protect family (this includes not just immediate family but extended family, close friends, even to community) above all. This is part of the reason for the Civil War, it is something that outsiders (especially Northerners) can never understand.
I personally believe this is (at least) partly a by product of our Scotch-Irish ancestry. Now I understand not all Southerners are Scotch-Irish but the main backbone of the South is Scotch-Irish. And this is a natural outgrowth from their shared Celtic Tribal/Clan culture. In that heritage, the Tribe (and eventually Clan) came first. You owed your first loyalty to that group and that was carried over when they settled this country. This was a steel part of out soul long before our ancestors came over and it always will be. This is why we identify more with where we grow up more than those from the North do. This is why during the Civil War, Southerners tended to side with the South and more importantly their State over the United States.. over the Union.
We Southerners can and will always fix our errors without outside help, BUT we often do not fix them fast enough, much to our lasting regret and sorrow. We also MUST fix them on our own, any outsiders CANNOT do it for us. I am not saying they should't necessarily try (that is a debate for a different day) but that it won't do any good. All it does is cause us to "bow up" our backs and circle the war wagons. It is viewed as intrusion and interference by outsiders and will ALWAYS cause us to "close up the shop". We must work through them on our own, we only hope that we learn from past mistakes and learn to recognize them sooner and fix them before too much damage is done.
This next part will generate much debate (from all 3 of you that read it that is...lol) but it is my opinion. Part of the reason we had to go through the Civil Rights struggle was because of the Civil War. It is my contention (and I have no facts or basis for this other than my own opinion) that we would have eventually recognized the evils of slavery and ended that horrible blot on our past, but in our own way and on our own time. Please don't construe that statement as condoning it, it is not and it should have ended sooner than it did and as far slavery is concerned is a good thing the war happened and it ended. I just mean that while it ended slavery itself, it did not end the reasons behind it and out of that grew the Civil Rights struggles and evil of the 1900's. I do feel that if we had been allowed to work through it and ended it on our own, then we could have avoided a lot of what went down in the 50's and 60's. It would not have prevented all of it because their is evil out there and there always will be, but we could have avoided some of it.
Of course, such evil as slavery and racism can never be overcome without struggle and pain. Much of it is necessary, for it must be punished and eradicated and just like cancer our other diseases, that is not done without pain and struggle.
Anyway, this is only part 1 and I have rambled on long enough and probably stirred up enough problems so I will end Part 1 here. I just wanted to say that right or wrong, being such a proud, loyal, stubborn people there are some things we HAVE to work through ourselves. Even with all the sin and evil and errors of our past, I am still and ALWAYS will be a proud Southerner.
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
Where did civility go?
When did it start being ok to be disrespectful and discourteous when we had a disagreement or difference of opinion? Maybe it has always been this way and I have just blindly ignored it, or maybe it was just between my friends and I what we could disagree respectfully. I am not really sure, but the fact is that today the atmosphere of dialogue and debate is toxic.
Yes, ever since our founding we Americans have always enjoyed a good argument. It can get heated, voices can get raised and passions are certainly stoked. But it was still usually done with at least a modicum of respect for the other side, or at least those involved pretended to have respect at any rate.
I am not sure when or why exactly all that changed to the current atmosphere where instead of respectfully listening to what our opponent is saying and trying to find the reasons behind why he feels as he does, we just try and shout them down. And when we find ourselves in a position that we cannot defend, we resort to name calling and insults and once that happens there is no coming back.
I feel that part of the blame lies with social media such as Facebook, Twitter, IM, etc. Whereas in the past most debate, difference of opinion would happen socially in a forum such as a town hall, or a coffee shop, today we are able to just immediately take to Social Media and put whatever we want out there. While social media brings lots of good to the table it also brings the bad. Instead of having to face out opponents and look in their eyes, we can now respond without ever seeing the other person. We don't have to worry about hurting their feelings or insulting them. Whereas before there were repercussions to name calling and insulting such as: having the same thrown back at us to physical confrontation (and let me pause to say here that there is NEVER a reason or excuse to resort to physical confrontation) when doing it from cyberspace those concerns are removed. And with those restraints removed we feel free to be as angry, disrespectful and uncivil as we want.
There are admittedly other causes and reasons other than just social media and that is part of why I am writing this... to figure them out.
Yes, ever since our founding we Americans have always enjoyed a good argument. It can get heated, voices can get raised and passions are certainly stoked. But it was still usually done with at least a modicum of respect for the other side, or at least those involved pretended to have respect at any rate.
I am not sure when or why exactly all that changed to the current atmosphere where instead of respectfully listening to what our opponent is saying and trying to find the reasons behind why he feels as he does, we just try and shout them down. And when we find ourselves in a position that we cannot defend, we resort to name calling and insults and once that happens there is no coming back.
I feel that part of the blame lies with social media such as Facebook, Twitter, IM, etc. Whereas in the past most debate, difference of opinion would happen socially in a forum such as a town hall, or a coffee shop, today we are able to just immediately take to Social Media and put whatever we want out there. While social media brings lots of good to the table it also brings the bad. Instead of having to face out opponents and look in their eyes, we can now respond without ever seeing the other person. We don't have to worry about hurting their feelings or insulting them. Whereas before there were repercussions to name calling and insulting such as: having the same thrown back at us to physical confrontation (and let me pause to say here that there is NEVER a reason or excuse to resort to physical confrontation) when doing it from cyberspace those concerns are removed. And with those restraints removed we feel free to be as angry, disrespectful and uncivil as we want.
There are admittedly other causes and reasons other than just social media and that is part of why I am writing this... to figure them out.
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
Hollow Hope?
I have been doing a lot of reading about the Civil Rights Struggles of the 1960's, thanks to a new novel I am reading by Greg Iles "Natchez Burning". I have also watched several documentaries as well as the movies "Mississippi Burning" and "Ghosts of Mississippi". And it makes me wonder, Have we really changed or learned anything?
I was born in 1972 and so by the time I grew old enough to understand, thankfully most of the worst of the Violence, Killing, and Racism in the South had ended. I never had to really go through it or had to make that choice of which side to take. I had the leisure and ease of not seeing the differences or hate that those who lived during those times did. I have been lucky in that, I got to grow up alongside and amongst people of all races and skin colors without having to be made to choose between "those people" or "my own race". However, I have also not fooled myself in thinking the divide, the hate, the racism has been solved or been overcome. It has just taken a different tack, it has grown passive but it is still there. And I am afraid it always will be. There will always be racism and hate, thankfully though it is not as widespread and we are learning to recognize it and head it off before it gets to the levels that it once reached.
I often ask myself while reading or watching such stories, what would I do if I were there. I want to say that I would stand up and fight the hate and racism, but I am fooling myself. If I were constantly under the thumb of such hate and vehemence and dialogue, I would probably feel the same way. If I were pressured by the KKK and other hate filled racists and suffered intimidation, I would honestly probably knuckle under it and at the very least turn a blind eye to it all. Thankfully, I don't have to, but it scares me to consider it.
While the current controversy over LGBT rights and same sex marriage has not risen to the same overt, widespread level of violence and destruction as we saw in the Civil Rights of the 1960's, and I hope it never does, the shadow is ever present. We must remain ever vigilant to ensure that it DOES NOT reach such levels. We have to have those who are ready to make those stands, regardless of whatever peer pressure or intimidation arises, and we have to be ready before it happens. We must NEVER let such events happen again. Regardless of how you feel about the LGBT community, regardless of if you believe it is genetic or a choice, regardless of if you agree with their lifestyle we must not let those views ever degenerate to hate.
Before anyone tries to raise disagreement with me using the Bible, yes I know those passages you will mention and so what? I don't see those passages followed by permission to respond with hate and violence. Remember, the hate filled racists during the Civil Rights Era also drew from the Bible passages to rationalize and excuse their behavior and actions. Many were church going deacons, leaders and yes even pastors. I don't say that to condemn any of those in the modern church, but so that we can go in with open eyes and realize that just using the Bible to rationalize and excuse your views and behavior does not always equate to right. Even with all that, we are still called to love our fellow man and treat him equally and right. We don't have to agree, but they are due our respect and acceptance.
NO ONE is asking you or making you change your religious definition of marriage. NO ONE is changing God's definition (whatever that may be, I am not God and thus not qualified to speak for God). All they are talking about is the CIVIL, LEGAL definition and to have the same rights as anyone else. I stand with them regardless of how that may affect me and my standing with anyone. They have the same right to marry and live their lives as you and I do.
No matter where you fall on such issues, we must be willing to sit down and talk to each other. To grant each other the same respect, tolerance, and treatment we demand for ourselves. If we don't learn this, then that shadow will only grow, darken and feed and we will find ourselves right back where we were in the 1960's (or even where German was in the 1930's and 40's). We must not fail each other and our future generations like that ever again.
I was born in 1972 and so by the time I grew old enough to understand, thankfully most of the worst of the Violence, Killing, and Racism in the South had ended. I never had to really go through it or had to make that choice of which side to take. I had the leisure and ease of not seeing the differences or hate that those who lived during those times did. I have been lucky in that, I got to grow up alongside and amongst people of all races and skin colors without having to be made to choose between "those people" or "my own race". However, I have also not fooled myself in thinking the divide, the hate, the racism has been solved or been overcome. It has just taken a different tack, it has grown passive but it is still there. And I am afraid it always will be. There will always be racism and hate, thankfully though it is not as widespread and we are learning to recognize it and head it off before it gets to the levels that it once reached.
I often ask myself while reading or watching such stories, what would I do if I were there. I want to say that I would stand up and fight the hate and racism, but I am fooling myself. If I were constantly under the thumb of such hate and vehemence and dialogue, I would probably feel the same way. If I were pressured by the KKK and other hate filled racists and suffered intimidation, I would honestly probably knuckle under it and at the very least turn a blind eye to it all. Thankfully, I don't have to, but it scares me to consider it.
While the current controversy over LGBT rights and same sex marriage has not risen to the same overt, widespread level of violence and destruction as we saw in the Civil Rights of the 1960's, and I hope it never does, the shadow is ever present. We must remain ever vigilant to ensure that it DOES NOT reach such levels. We have to have those who are ready to make those stands, regardless of whatever peer pressure or intimidation arises, and we have to be ready before it happens. We must NEVER let such events happen again. Regardless of how you feel about the LGBT community, regardless of if you believe it is genetic or a choice, regardless of if you agree with their lifestyle we must not let those views ever degenerate to hate.
Before anyone tries to raise disagreement with me using the Bible, yes I know those passages you will mention and so what? I don't see those passages followed by permission to respond with hate and violence. Remember, the hate filled racists during the Civil Rights Era also drew from the Bible passages to rationalize and excuse their behavior and actions. Many were church going deacons, leaders and yes even pastors. I don't say that to condemn any of those in the modern church, but so that we can go in with open eyes and realize that just using the Bible to rationalize and excuse your views and behavior does not always equate to right. Even with all that, we are still called to love our fellow man and treat him equally and right. We don't have to agree, but they are due our respect and acceptance.
NO ONE is asking you or making you change your religious definition of marriage. NO ONE is changing God's definition (whatever that may be, I am not God and thus not qualified to speak for God). All they are talking about is the CIVIL, LEGAL definition and to have the same rights as anyone else. I stand with them regardless of how that may affect me and my standing with anyone. They have the same right to marry and live their lives as you and I do.
No matter where you fall on such issues, we must be willing to sit down and talk to each other. To grant each other the same respect, tolerance, and treatment we demand for ourselves. If we don't learn this, then that shadow will only grow, darken and feed and we will find ourselves right back where we were in the 1960's (or even where German was in the 1930's and 40's). We must not fail each other and our future generations like that ever again.
Monday, May 19, 2014
I am not a smart man...
Perusing through the responses from modern evangelical church leaders about the current debates over homosexuality and same sex marriage, I see a lot of "so and so has not been to seminary", "so and so is not theologically trained", and other similar statements. So, the dividing line between correct interpretations and incorrect is being theologically trained? Going to a seminary? If so, then to paraphrase Forrest Gump, "I am not a smart man". I am a theological idiot (no replies from the peanut gallery on the idiot part please).
Call me stupid but I thought that part of the point of Jesus was that we could now have a personal relationship with God through him. That we didn't need anyone to intercede for us. That we didn't need a go between. That we didn't need an "interpreter". After all, the Jews had had such for a long time and obviously were getting a lot wrong, hence part of the reason for Jesus to come along. Most of Jesus most scathing diatribes and condemnations were for the so called "Theologically trained", leaders of the church (or faith) who were keeping people out with their rules and prohibitions.
When condemning the Pharisees Jesus never said they were wrong (or right for that matter), what he called them out for was the wrong focus. They were keeping people out of heaven by their "holier than thou" attitude and behavior. I don't question that they truly believed they were serving God and fighting for God, but all they were doing was driving people away and making it impossible for them to see the light. Maybe it is time, we take a look in the mirror and ask ourselves, "Is this exactly what we are doing today with our reliance on seminary and "theological" training? We can have all the right thinking and training we want, but if all it does is alienate people and drive them away, where is the good in it?
But now, 2000 years later, if you disagree with the "brain trust", but haven't been to seminary you are ignorant and wrong. We may in fact be wrong, but it isn't because we have or have not been to seminary or are "theologically" trained.
Not to mention that there are plenty of seminaries to choose from.. there are super conservative seminaries, there are super liberal seminaries, and more in between. Which ones are right and which ones are wrong? Who decides? Who watches the watchmen?
I don't see the calling out of not being "theologically" trained for those who agree with the "brain trust"? If one agrees but has not been to seminary or been "theologically" trained then where did one get such right knowledge? How can one have the right knowledge without going to such a place? Oh wait... that's right, they got it from you who HAVE been "theologically" trained at a seminary.
Last time I checked, I understood a personal relationship as meaning that it was between me and some other person. That only the 2 of us understood the fullness of it, and that only the 2 of us knew what it entailed. Anyone else could only observe from the outside and make judgements based on sch incomplete evidence. For example, if myself and a friend, were observed berating each other and insulting each other and calling each other some of the most demeaning things, an outsider could only interpret that as we were about to throw down. However, in truth, that is how my friend and I interact. WE both understand this and accept this and know that neither of us mean any of it and that we would have the other's back in a heartbeat. But without that intimate knowledge one can only truthfully see a fight getting ready to happen.
So, if I have a personal relationship with Jesus, then NO ONE else can speak to that or tell me how to live it since they aren't part of it. And if in that relationship, I don't feel Jesus telling me to shame my LGBT friends for their lifestyle then where do you get the right to tell me I am wrong? Oh wait.. I forgot, all that theological training at seminary gives you that right. My apologies.
Not to mention, now, 2000 years later, who's to say that we haven't still gotten something wrong. The truth is, even the theological training and doctrine most of us accept and follow still started out as someone's interpretation. I am not saying, any interpretations are wrong or right, I am not qualified enough to make that judgement.. my point is that neither are you. Even if you have been to a seminary.
Seminaries help in certain ways, of that I have no doubt, but they are not the be all, end all of theological training or knowledge. And attending one does not make you any better, any smarter, or any closer to the truth and God than anyone else.
I still choose to believe that my relationship with Jesus trumps your theological training and seminary degree, and I am tired of being treated as an idiot when I disagree just because I have not been to one.
Call me stupid but I thought that part of the point of Jesus was that we could now have a personal relationship with God through him. That we didn't need anyone to intercede for us. That we didn't need a go between. That we didn't need an "interpreter". After all, the Jews had had such for a long time and obviously were getting a lot wrong, hence part of the reason for Jesus to come along. Most of Jesus most scathing diatribes and condemnations were for the so called "Theologically trained", leaders of the church (or faith) who were keeping people out with their rules and prohibitions.
When condemning the Pharisees Jesus never said they were wrong (or right for that matter), what he called them out for was the wrong focus. They were keeping people out of heaven by their "holier than thou" attitude and behavior. I don't question that they truly believed they were serving God and fighting for God, but all they were doing was driving people away and making it impossible for them to see the light. Maybe it is time, we take a look in the mirror and ask ourselves, "Is this exactly what we are doing today with our reliance on seminary and "theological" training? We can have all the right thinking and training we want, but if all it does is alienate people and drive them away, where is the good in it?
But now, 2000 years later, if you disagree with the "brain trust", but haven't been to seminary you are ignorant and wrong. We may in fact be wrong, but it isn't because we have or have not been to seminary or are "theologically" trained.
Not to mention that there are plenty of seminaries to choose from.. there are super conservative seminaries, there are super liberal seminaries, and more in between. Which ones are right and which ones are wrong? Who decides? Who watches the watchmen?
I don't see the calling out of not being "theologically" trained for those who agree with the "brain trust"? If one agrees but has not been to seminary or been "theologically" trained then where did one get such right knowledge? How can one have the right knowledge without going to such a place? Oh wait... that's right, they got it from you who HAVE been "theologically" trained at a seminary.
Last time I checked, I understood a personal relationship as meaning that it was between me and some other person. That only the 2 of us understood the fullness of it, and that only the 2 of us knew what it entailed. Anyone else could only observe from the outside and make judgements based on sch incomplete evidence. For example, if myself and a friend, were observed berating each other and insulting each other and calling each other some of the most demeaning things, an outsider could only interpret that as we were about to throw down. However, in truth, that is how my friend and I interact. WE both understand this and accept this and know that neither of us mean any of it and that we would have the other's back in a heartbeat. But without that intimate knowledge one can only truthfully see a fight getting ready to happen.
So, if I have a personal relationship with Jesus, then NO ONE else can speak to that or tell me how to live it since they aren't part of it. And if in that relationship, I don't feel Jesus telling me to shame my LGBT friends for their lifestyle then where do you get the right to tell me I am wrong? Oh wait.. I forgot, all that theological training at seminary gives you that right. My apologies.
Not to mention, now, 2000 years later, who's to say that we haven't still gotten something wrong. The truth is, even the theological training and doctrine most of us accept and follow still started out as someone's interpretation. I am not saying, any interpretations are wrong or right, I am not qualified enough to make that judgement.. my point is that neither are you. Even if you have been to a seminary.
Seminaries help in certain ways, of that I have no doubt, but they are not the be all, end all of theological training or knowledge. And attending one does not make you any better, any smarter, or any closer to the truth and God than anyone else.
I still choose to believe that my relationship with Jesus trumps your theological training and seminary degree, and I am tired of being treated as an idiot when I disagree just because I have not been to one.
Saturday, May 17, 2014
Soul Searching Saturday
Every so often I intend this blog to not be so sarcastic, but to include soulful, honest posts. Posts where I explain and tell about myself. I would say, please dear readers feel free to ask any questions you would like to ask in the comments section (or email me) but since there are probably only 3 or 4 of you and you are some of my closest friends you already know about me, but feel free anyway.
Today, I want to explain a little about some of my recent posts about the church and the same sex marriage debates. Why I am so "angry about them all".
I grew up Southern Baptist and have attended church pretty much my entire life. I love the church and it contains some beautiful, loving people. But I also despise the church and it also contains some of the most judgmental, hateful people I have ever met. In this way it is no different than humanity which is part of the point of it I think. Anyway, what disturbs me most theses days is the response to the same sex marriage debate going on today. It disturbs me to see the appeal to scripture and using that as the basis for their behavior. Scripture has been used throughout history to rationalize and excuse all kinds of behavior, most recently (historically anyway) slavery and civil rights toward African Americans. Many of the proponents of slavery used scripture ago excuse their perpetuation of the system. But thankfully many others also used scripture and appealed to scripture to fight against slavery and eventually bring it to an end in the US. I see much the same thing happening today in regards same sex marriage and treatment/acceptance of our LGBT brothers and sisters. I am not smart enough or qualified enough to make a judgement over what is right or wrong. I am just a typical sinful, judgmental (at times), lonely, searching human being who tries his best to keep from drowning in hate, greed, and judgement.
Anyway, what I have experienced over the last few years has been a change in my outlook and views. As I take my faith more serious and make it foremost in my life and treatment of others, I find myself getting further and further from my past, further from the Evangelical Leadership that I used to blindly follow. I used to accept and agree with most anything the leadership would express, because they obviously knew most than I did and besides it was too much work to learn it for myself. But that has been changing.
As I got to know more LGBT individuals I found my views changing little by little. I am not saying what is right or wrong.. again I am not qualified enough to make that judgement. Just that as I got to know more of them and to know them personally, it was no longer so easy to make snap judgements about them or their lifestyles. I found out they were no different from me. They weren't the monsters they had been made out to be by some, they were fellow human beings, just as confused, lonely, and searching as I was.
And even more recently a good friend "came out" to me and told me he was Gay and had been his entire life, but that he had always had to hide it. That broke my heart, regardless of whether I agree with it or not, NO ONE should have to hide who they are or feel bad for who they are. But he also then told me that my response to that, my acceptance of it encouraged him to tell everyone. I can't express to you or him how big of an honor that was. Nor can I tell him how that gave me the strength and courage to re-examine some of my long held views and to change them and then defend them and stand for what I now feel is the correct attitude. I have grown more vocal about some things and that all grew out of the fact that it was no longer just an "issue", now it had a face and a personality that I knew and respected. It is harder to condemn and belittle when it takes on such forms.
I don't expect anyone to change their views, or what they feel is right. That is not my job, right , or place. But I do wish they would make it an active effort to seek out those different from them on whatever, get to know them. Get to know them really, deeply, and honestly. Learn what they love, what they fear, what makes them who and how they are. If more of us did that, we won't necessarily change our minds, but we will be more respectful to each other and that is ultimately what is most important and will bring the most lasting change.
Today, I want to explain a little about some of my recent posts about the church and the same sex marriage debates. Why I am so "angry about them all".
I grew up Southern Baptist and have attended church pretty much my entire life. I love the church and it contains some beautiful, loving people. But I also despise the church and it also contains some of the most judgmental, hateful people I have ever met. In this way it is no different than humanity which is part of the point of it I think. Anyway, what disturbs me most theses days is the response to the same sex marriage debate going on today. It disturbs me to see the appeal to scripture and using that as the basis for their behavior. Scripture has been used throughout history to rationalize and excuse all kinds of behavior, most recently (historically anyway) slavery and civil rights toward African Americans. Many of the proponents of slavery used scripture ago excuse their perpetuation of the system. But thankfully many others also used scripture and appealed to scripture to fight against slavery and eventually bring it to an end in the US. I see much the same thing happening today in regards same sex marriage and treatment/acceptance of our LGBT brothers and sisters. I am not smart enough or qualified enough to make a judgement over what is right or wrong. I am just a typical sinful, judgmental (at times), lonely, searching human being who tries his best to keep from drowning in hate, greed, and judgement.
Anyway, what I have experienced over the last few years has been a change in my outlook and views. As I take my faith more serious and make it foremost in my life and treatment of others, I find myself getting further and further from my past, further from the Evangelical Leadership that I used to blindly follow. I used to accept and agree with most anything the leadership would express, because they obviously knew most than I did and besides it was too much work to learn it for myself. But that has been changing.
As I got to know more LGBT individuals I found my views changing little by little. I am not saying what is right or wrong.. again I am not qualified enough to make that judgement. Just that as I got to know more of them and to know them personally, it was no longer so easy to make snap judgements about them or their lifestyles. I found out they were no different from me. They weren't the monsters they had been made out to be by some, they were fellow human beings, just as confused, lonely, and searching as I was.
And even more recently a good friend "came out" to me and told me he was Gay and had been his entire life, but that he had always had to hide it. That broke my heart, regardless of whether I agree with it or not, NO ONE should have to hide who they are or feel bad for who they are. But he also then told me that my response to that, my acceptance of it encouraged him to tell everyone. I can't express to you or him how big of an honor that was. Nor can I tell him how that gave me the strength and courage to re-examine some of my long held views and to change them and then defend them and stand for what I now feel is the correct attitude. I have grown more vocal about some things and that all grew out of the fact that it was no longer just an "issue", now it had a face and a personality that I knew and respected. It is harder to condemn and belittle when it takes on such forms.
I don't expect anyone to change their views, or what they feel is right. That is not my job, right , or place. But I do wish they would make it an active effort to seek out those different from them on whatever, get to know them. Get to know them really, deeply, and honestly. Learn what they love, what they fear, what makes them who and how they are. If more of us did that, we won't necessarily change our minds, but we will be more respectful to each other and that is ultimately what is most important and will bring the most lasting change.
Friday, May 16, 2014
I want a refund.
I think I got ripped off when I bought my Bible and am thinking about taking it back and asking for a refund. Judging (oops, I am judging already, see where an incomplete Bible is already getting me) from the talk of a lot of mainstream, evangelical Christian leaders such as Al Mohler, Pat Robertson, Denny Burk, and others, my Bible is apparently incomplete and I am missing some sections.
My Bible (the one I purchased and have been reading and trying to follow at any rate) does not contain a version of the 10 Commandments where homosexuality and same sex marriage are forbidden and outlawed. It also omits the parts of the Gospels and Jesus sayings where he specifically called out LGBT individuals and their lifestyles. It omits the prohibitions against same sex marriage. I am also missing the sections where divorce is still OK with and approved by God, especially if the person has committed adultery, or heaven forbid gets Alzheimers.
I must have either bought a poorly edited version or a faulty one because it contains NONE of those things I mentioned above. But apparently these wise Christian leaders have the complete versions with the missing sections, that must be the kind you can only get by going to seminary. This must be the reason I can never find complete happiness and joy in life outside of Heaven. It must also be the reason I am so conflicted in how to treat people, see the Bible I have teaches me (and convicts me) that I should treat EVERYONE equally. As Human Beings created and loved by God, AS THEY ARE. As fallible, emotional, lonely, seeking, loving creatures. It teaches me that I am NO better than any of them are, and that I have no right to judge them (well, mine does allow me to judge and belittle graduates and fans of the University of Texas, the Oakland Raiders, the New York Yankees and Detroit Red Wings because they are all obviously spawns of Satan) in ANY capacity.
Now, my Bible does mention relations between same sexes but it also says I shouldn't eat Pork (sorry but I love bacon far too much to give that up), shouldn't eat shell fish (sorry, but I enjoy Joe's Crab Shack and Red Lobster far too much), amongst other prohibitions. But wait, those are ok for us now... since Jesus came, we are no longer beholden to those, but we are to some others? I don't understand.. so some are ok to ignore but not others? Who gets to decide that?
I am told that my relationship with God through Jesus is a personal relationship, just the 2 of us. So doesn't that mean I get to interpret such stuff? Or I am missing yet another section where that is explained to me?
I try to follow the 10 commandments (as best as I can, which isn't anywhere near good enough) and I try to follow the red words in the New Testament. Outside of those things the rest is just someone's interpretation (I await your angry comments and emails), and thus not any better than my own. I may be proven wrong one day but when and if that happens, it will be by God himself (again, just using the male pronoun I am most familiar with) and not another human being. Until then, I will leave the judgement up to him and just try to love my fellow human beings as well as I can. Maybe it is some thing we should ALL try.
My Bible (the one I purchased and have been reading and trying to follow at any rate) does not contain a version of the 10 Commandments where homosexuality and same sex marriage are forbidden and outlawed. It also omits the parts of the Gospels and Jesus sayings where he specifically called out LGBT individuals and their lifestyles. It omits the prohibitions against same sex marriage. I am also missing the sections where divorce is still OK with and approved by God, especially if the person has committed adultery, or heaven forbid gets Alzheimers.
I must have either bought a poorly edited version or a faulty one because it contains NONE of those things I mentioned above. But apparently these wise Christian leaders have the complete versions with the missing sections, that must be the kind you can only get by going to seminary. This must be the reason I can never find complete happiness and joy in life outside of Heaven. It must also be the reason I am so conflicted in how to treat people, see the Bible I have teaches me (and convicts me) that I should treat EVERYONE equally. As Human Beings created and loved by God, AS THEY ARE. As fallible, emotional, lonely, seeking, loving creatures. It teaches me that I am NO better than any of them are, and that I have no right to judge them (well, mine does allow me to judge and belittle graduates and fans of the University of Texas, the Oakland Raiders, the New York Yankees and Detroit Red Wings because they are all obviously spawns of Satan) in ANY capacity.
Now, my Bible does mention relations between same sexes but it also says I shouldn't eat Pork (sorry but I love bacon far too much to give that up), shouldn't eat shell fish (sorry, but I enjoy Joe's Crab Shack and Red Lobster far too much), amongst other prohibitions. But wait, those are ok for us now... since Jesus came, we are no longer beholden to those, but we are to some others? I don't understand.. so some are ok to ignore but not others? Who gets to decide that?
I am told that my relationship with God through Jesus is a personal relationship, just the 2 of us. So doesn't that mean I get to interpret such stuff? Or I am missing yet another section where that is explained to me?
I try to follow the 10 commandments (as best as I can, which isn't anywhere near good enough) and I try to follow the red words in the New Testament. Outside of those things the rest is just someone's interpretation (I await your angry comments and emails), and thus not any better than my own. I may be proven wrong one day but when and if that happens, it will be by God himself (again, just using the male pronoun I am most familiar with) and not another human being. Until then, I will leave the judgement up to him and just try to love my fellow human beings as well as I can. Maybe it is some thing we should ALL try.
Thursday, May 15, 2014
Skeered Straight
I recently had a LGBT friend send me a link to a story about the LGBT community being warm and welcoming when one first comes out, but quickly distancing themselves when one actually wants to partner up because one is overweight or even just a little on the chubby side.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/louispeitzman/it-gets-better-unless-youre-fat
My first thought when reading this was that surely this was written by the homophobic community, because nothing would go further in scaring me straight (were I experimenting in college for example) than finding out that the LGBT community was no different, was just as shallow, as the straight community. This has the potential to do their mean spirited, bigoted work for them. I mean I can get rejected and ridiculed and wind up alone with a magazine, some tissues and a jar of vasoline on any given night on my own in the straight community. My one hope was that maybe, should I decide to experiment one day, that I could find acceptance in the LGBT community.
Now that I find out, it is no different than my own heterosexual group I think I will just stay straight thank you very much. I already have a complex over being rejected by my own people, if I were to add being rejected for being pudgy by someone else I would just as well walk into an "All You can eat" Buffalo Wing and Tapioca Pudding restaurant and end it all right there.
Listen to me homophobic community (yes I am looking directly at you "Moral Majority" and "Focus on the Family"). Here you have a Pro-LGBT article telling us that they are no different than the heterosexuals are. And before you come after me with pitchforks and torches think about it, what better way to keep the wandering, inquisitive amongst you straight than to point out that the gay community is no different? That they will be treated no differently there, that they can be rejected and ridiculed for being overweight and pimply challenged. Who would even WANT to switch sides if they are just going to suffer the same? You should be passing this article around like a proud father does cigars (or used to pass out that is before the tobacco temperance crusade ended that tradition).
My point is this, we continually get more and more evidence that the LGBT community is no different in ANY way that the heterosexual community. It contains loving, committed couples who just want to have a family and be left alone. It contains greedy, selfish, hoarding bastards just like the dynamic Donald duo (Trump and Sterling). It contains self absorbed, shallow asshole bullies who mock and ridicule the more solidly built amongst us. It is full of lost, lonely, people searching for love, acceptance, and meaning who are created and loved by God as they are.
They aren't going to give you "gayties" (that's gay cooties) just by touching or proximity. They aren't going to follow you around, drooling and lusting after you in the locker room at the golf course. Actually odds are that if you are among the more "sturdily" built, the kind that wouldn't be moved in a windstorm, even being a bigoted, judgmental asshole, then you they wouldn't want to touch you anyway. So why get bent out of shape about it?
Surely we can extend them some tolerance and acceptance of our own and treat them as the worthy, honorable human beings they are. It's the least ANY of us deserve.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/louispeitzman/it-gets-better-unless-youre-fat
My first thought when reading this was that surely this was written by the homophobic community, because nothing would go further in scaring me straight (were I experimenting in college for example) than finding out that the LGBT community was no different, was just as shallow, as the straight community. This has the potential to do their mean spirited, bigoted work for them. I mean I can get rejected and ridiculed and wind up alone with a magazine, some tissues and a jar of vasoline on any given night on my own in the straight community. My one hope was that maybe, should I decide to experiment one day, that I could find acceptance in the LGBT community.
Now that I find out, it is no different than my own heterosexual group I think I will just stay straight thank you very much. I already have a complex over being rejected by my own people, if I were to add being rejected for being pudgy by someone else I would just as well walk into an "All You can eat" Buffalo Wing and Tapioca Pudding restaurant and end it all right there.
Listen to me homophobic community (yes I am looking directly at you "Moral Majority" and "Focus on the Family"). Here you have a Pro-LGBT article telling us that they are no different than the heterosexuals are. And before you come after me with pitchforks and torches think about it, what better way to keep the wandering, inquisitive amongst you straight than to point out that the gay community is no different? That they will be treated no differently there, that they can be rejected and ridiculed for being overweight and pimply challenged. Who would even WANT to switch sides if they are just going to suffer the same? You should be passing this article around like a proud father does cigars (or used to pass out that is before the tobacco temperance crusade ended that tradition).
My point is this, we continually get more and more evidence that the LGBT community is no different in ANY way that the heterosexual community. It contains loving, committed couples who just want to have a family and be left alone. It contains greedy, selfish, hoarding bastards just like the dynamic Donald duo (Trump and Sterling). It contains self absorbed, shallow asshole bullies who mock and ridicule the more solidly built amongst us. It is full of lost, lonely, people searching for love, acceptance, and meaning who are created and loved by God as they are.
They aren't going to give you "gayties" (that's gay cooties) just by touching or proximity. They aren't going to follow you around, drooling and lusting after you in the locker room at the golf course. Actually odds are that if you are among the more "sturdily" built, the kind that wouldn't be moved in a windstorm, even being a bigoted, judgmental asshole, then you they wouldn't want to touch you anyway. So why get bent out of shape about it?
Surely we can extend them some tolerance and acceptance of our own and treat them as the worthy, honorable human beings they are. It's the least ANY of us deserve.
Wednesday, May 14, 2014
My God can beat up your 3rd Grader
In the interest of honesty I want to say that I write this as a believer in Jesus and someone who tries his best to follow his teachings and example.
Everyone has a different view of God and what He wants and likes. I use the pronoun He for God because (a) I am a guy and that is the one I am most familiar with, and (b) it just seemed wrong to refer to the Supreme Being as an It. If you prefer to refer to God as a She, go right ahead, you won't offend me seeing as how God is truly neither and both.
Since everyone has their own view of God, they also have their own interpretation of what we wants from us, what he expects us to be, and how he wants us to behave. They range from the Ultra-Liberal interpretation that believes that God is ALL of us, that we are ALL God. They can be recognized by the botox smile that is frozen on their face and are usually found handing out flowers. I don't subscribe to this kind of God because I know most of humanity and if we are the best we can expect, then count me out, I hope to be better than I currently am. The other end of the spectrum is the Ultra-Conservative interpretation who are better known and "Fundies" or The Fundamentalists. This group can be recognized by the continuous scowl on their face, and their multi-purpose "Christian Army Bible" that can function either as a thick club in which to beat all heathens until they submit or as an actual "Sword" in which to send someone to their eternal judgement where they will learn the error of their heathen ways.
Now, the fundamentalists interpret God as wanting them to convert all heathens (read anyone who doesn't agree with them) in the most forceful, intensive, tough love method possible. They operate under the assumption that since Christianity began with a rigged trial with trumped up evidence, beatings, false assumptions about what constitutes sin and blasphemy, mocking, scourging, and ending with a crucifixion that that is obviously how God wants the faith to be propagated as well. They rationalize this with the claim that "if it was good enough for Jesus, it is good enough for the rest of us". So following this playbook they will tend to corner a suspected heathen on a street corner, or dark alley armed with their Multi Purpose Christian Army Study Bible and immediately put you on trial. They will then bring trumped up charges about your sin and blasphemy and how it offends God, they will follow this with false evidence claiming how your belief that you have no right to judge anyone will lead to humans marrying animals and sacrificing their children to the Xbox 1 in their living rooms. If you still persist in your blasphemy and sin they will wash their proverbial hands of your fate, after all they have done their best and it is your stubborn love of sin that condemns you, and hand you over the wiser elders to be crucified in the court of public opinion. You will be shunned and banned from all good society and will only find respite amongst the great unwashed.
It is a curious symptom of today's Christian society that the worst treatment of one another we will ever witness is when we are attempting to defend God. Why exact God needs defending is never adequately explained by those doing the defending. Why the supreme creator of everything would need weak, fallible, confused, sinful human beings to defend him is a conveniently overlooked item in one's holy crusade to force everyone else to agree that MY interpretation is right. After all, the church has forcibly converted people all throughout history from the Vikings to the Native Americans and that worked out well... uhm.. didn't it? Oh that's right, it didn't.
Maybe it is time we actually read the red words in the bible and try to honestly follow them. If your Bible doesn't have red words in the NT section, then you might want to consider getting one that does. Your whole world and way of looking at the world and at your fellow man just might change for the better. No one has EVER been converted because they lost an argument with you, or by hearing how worthless, evil and sinful they are.
Jesus came to show us a better way.. a way of love, respect, and acceptance of others.. as they are, for who they are, without change. He loved us so much that even at our worst he loved us so much that chose to die for us rather than live without us. Maybe it is time we felt the same about each other as Jesus did about us. Maybe it is time we choose love, and acceptance instead of condemnation and force. After all... if it was good enough for Jesus, isn't it good enough for us?
Everyone has a different view of God and what He wants and likes. I use the pronoun He for God because (a) I am a guy and that is the one I am most familiar with, and (b) it just seemed wrong to refer to the Supreme Being as an It. If you prefer to refer to God as a She, go right ahead, you won't offend me seeing as how God is truly neither and both.
Since everyone has their own view of God, they also have their own interpretation of what we wants from us, what he expects us to be, and how he wants us to behave. They range from the Ultra-Liberal interpretation that believes that God is ALL of us, that we are ALL God. They can be recognized by the botox smile that is frozen on their face and are usually found handing out flowers. I don't subscribe to this kind of God because I know most of humanity and if we are the best we can expect, then count me out, I hope to be better than I currently am. The other end of the spectrum is the Ultra-Conservative interpretation who are better known and "Fundies" or The Fundamentalists. This group can be recognized by the continuous scowl on their face, and their multi-purpose "Christian Army Bible" that can function either as a thick club in which to beat all heathens until they submit or as an actual "Sword" in which to send someone to their eternal judgement where they will learn the error of their heathen ways.
Now, the fundamentalists interpret God as wanting them to convert all heathens (read anyone who doesn't agree with them) in the most forceful, intensive, tough love method possible. They operate under the assumption that since Christianity began with a rigged trial with trumped up evidence, beatings, false assumptions about what constitutes sin and blasphemy, mocking, scourging, and ending with a crucifixion that that is obviously how God wants the faith to be propagated as well. They rationalize this with the claim that "if it was good enough for Jesus, it is good enough for the rest of us". So following this playbook they will tend to corner a suspected heathen on a street corner, or dark alley armed with their Multi Purpose Christian Army Study Bible and immediately put you on trial. They will then bring trumped up charges about your sin and blasphemy and how it offends God, they will follow this with false evidence claiming how your belief that you have no right to judge anyone will lead to humans marrying animals and sacrificing their children to the Xbox 1 in their living rooms. If you still persist in your blasphemy and sin they will wash their proverbial hands of your fate, after all they have done their best and it is your stubborn love of sin that condemns you, and hand you over the wiser elders to be crucified in the court of public opinion. You will be shunned and banned from all good society and will only find respite amongst the great unwashed.
It is a curious symptom of today's Christian society that the worst treatment of one another we will ever witness is when we are attempting to defend God. Why exact God needs defending is never adequately explained by those doing the defending. Why the supreme creator of everything would need weak, fallible, confused, sinful human beings to defend him is a conveniently overlooked item in one's holy crusade to force everyone else to agree that MY interpretation is right. After all, the church has forcibly converted people all throughout history from the Vikings to the Native Americans and that worked out well... uhm.. didn't it? Oh that's right, it didn't.
Maybe it is time we actually read the red words in the bible and try to honestly follow them. If your Bible doesn't have red words in the NT section, then you might want to consider getting one that does. Your whole world and way of looking at the world and at your fellow man just might change for the better. No one has EVER been converted because they lost an argument with you, or by hearing how worthless, evil and sinful they are.
Jesus came to show us a better way.. a way of love, respect, and acceptance of others.. as they are, for who they are, without change. He loved us so much that even at our worst he loved us so much that chose to die for us rather than live without us. Maybe it is time we felt the same about each other as Jesus did about us. Maybe it is time we choose love, and acceptance instead of condemnation and force. After all... if it was good enough for Jesus, isn't it good enough for us?
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Premature Election
This is the year 2014 which sits exactly halfway between the major election cycle in American politics. It is that time when just as we are thrilled that we have recovered from the previous cycle's negativity and have finally gotten all the dirt out of those sneaky, hidden crevices that we find the pre election skirmish lines are being sent out to "soften" the ground for the next cycle's negativity and campaign of mud.
Just as in a battle or a war, the competing ancient militaries used to send out skirmishers and modern armies attempt to "prepare" and "soften" the ground with artillery, the political parties begin to probe and "feel out" (relax ladies Bill Clinton cannot be everywhere, you are probably safe for the time being) the atmosphere of country.
We get to look forward to dodging mud and have learned to bunker down with plenty of hand sanitizer and Handi Wipes.
This is otherwise known as the American Political "Super Bowl" Pre Game, and endless, droning period filled with the history of politics, both parties, and they know best and have our best interests at heart.. just trust them.
In this year's version of the pre game, I am hearing various hopeful candidates make their claims that they are ready to be President. Really? You are ready? What makes you ready? What makes anyone ready to be President?
What are the qualifications needed to be ready? And where is the mendoza line or preparation and qualification? We are sorry you have great credentials and plenty of accomplishments but you are only at the proverbial .200 average and thus you aren't ready, but hey since we don't want to lose such a promising candidate we have spot for you in our platform-would you consider running for the local school board?
Just how much foreign policy experience is needed? You say you once took a vacation to Europe and backpacked through France? Well come on down. You say you can at least find Europe on a map? Come on down. You say you can at least spell Europe? Sorry, say have you considered running for the local school board?
How about national policy experience? You pay your taxes? That will probably stump them since they have never had such a person come through their pipeline before and have no clues how to handle you. You voted in the previous elections? Great, but how many times in those elections did you vote? If you answer once you are lazy, if you answer 2 or 3 they will ask if you are quitter, and if you answer more than 5 they will consider you from Chicago and move you to the front of the line. You say you love guns and that you own half the Soldier of Fortune catalog? Righteous, Rush Limbaugh and Rick Perry on Line 1.
How about previous political office holding experience? You can't have too little because you will tend to actually listen to your constituents and vote the way they want you to and we can't have that in politics. You also can't have too much because that means you are older and you will tend to actually listen to no one, or you will forget what you just said and wonder where your jello cup went. If you are from Chicago you can disregard most of this last section because you have obviously learned by now to do whatever the bosses tell you or have ignored the bosses and will never be found anyway.
Now we get to the Hollywood influence. Just how much influence in Hollywood do you have? How many stars and celebrities do you know or can you bring to endorse you? Hell, why even bother with this one, if you don't already know Oprah you might as well hang it up now. You don't stand a chance.
So just exactly what makes one ready to be President? And how can ANYONE possibly know this this far out? Pretty simple actually. If you aren't from Chicago or at least have Oprah in your corner (which let's face it is pretty much the same thing anyway) you can forget it. But have patience, wait a couple years till it starts all over again and maybe this time Texas will be the new Chicago or maybe all that sucking up to Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity as well as stocking your gun cabinet will finally pay off.
Just as in a battle or a war, the competing ancient militaries used to send out skirmishers and modern armies attempt to "prepare" and "soften" the ground with artillery, the political parties begin to probe and "feel out" (relax ladies Bill Clinton cannot be everywhere, you are probably safe for the time being) the atmosphere of country.
We get to look forward to dodging mud and have learned to bunker down with plenty of hand sanitizer and Handi Wipes.
This is otherwise known as the American Political "Super Bowl" Pre Game, and endless, droning period filled with the history of politics, both parties, and they know best and have our best interests at heart.. just trust them.
In this year's version of the pre game, I am hearing various hopeful candidates make their claims that they are ready to be President. Really? You are ready? What makes you ready? What makes anyone ready to be President?
What are the qualifications needed to be ready? And where is the mendoza line or preparation and qualification? We are sorry you have great credentials and plenty of accomplishments but you are only at the proverbial .200 average and thus you aren't ready, but hey since we don't want to lose such a promising candidate we have spot for you in our platform-would you consider running for the local school board?
Just how much foreign policy experience is needed? You say you once took a vacation to Europe and backpacked through France? Well come on down. You say you can at least find Europe on a map? Come on down. You say you can at least spell Europe? Sorry, say have you considered running for the local school board?
How about national policy experience? You pay your taxes? That will probably stump them since they have never had such a person come through their pipeline before and have no clues how to handle you. You voted in the previous elections? Great, but how many times in those elections did you vote? If you answer once you are lazy, if you answer 2 or 3 they will ask if you are quitter, and if you answer more than 5 they will consider you from Chicago and move you to the front of the line. You say you love guns and that you own half the Soldier of Fortune catalog? Righteous, Rush Limbaugh and Rick Perry on Line 1.
How about previous political office holding experience? You can't have too little because you will tend to actually listen to your constituents and vote the way they want you to and we can't have that in politics. You also can't have too much because that means you are older and you will tend to actually listen to no one, or you will forget what you just said and wonder where your jello cup went. If you are from Chicago you can disregard most of this last section because you have obviously learned by now to do whatever the bosses tell you or have ignored the bosses and will never be found anyway.
Now we get to the Hollywood influence. Just how much influence in Hollywood do you have? How many stars and celebrities do you know or can you bring to endorse you? Hell, why even bother with this one, if you don't already know Oprah you might as well hang it up now. You don't stand a chance.
So just exactly what makes one ready to be President? And how can ANYONE possibly know this this far out? Pretty simple actually. If you aren't from Chicago or at least have Oprah in your corner (which let's face it is pretty much the same thing anyway) you can forget it. But have patience, wait a couple years till it starts all over again and maybe this time Texas will be the new Chicago or maybe all that sucking up to Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity as well as stocking your gun cabinet will finally pay off.
Monday, May 12, 2014
Mother's Day Overdose
Disclaimer: This blog contains sarcasm, humor, irreverent humor, and profanity. If you are a prude, or are easily offended, you WILL be offended, so please stop reading now.
As I write this Mother's Day is over and I for one could not be more thrilled. It is not because I hate Mothers, nothing could be further from the truth, I love Mothers. It is also not because I don't agree they need recognition for all they do for us, hell most of us would be in far worse condition than we are if not for the hard work, sweat, and tears Mothers put in on our behalf. No, I am glad Mother's Day is over because I am tired of having to see and read all the sickly sweet, mostly contrived fake sentiment that takes over the airwaves and cyberspace.
If you are under the age of accountability which varies depending on what state or part of the country you are in but for the sake of argument let's say....14, you are excused from this because: a) you know no better, and b) you are probably forced to partake by either or both of your parents. However, anyone older than that, it is you I have a problem with.
If you are under the age of accountability which varies depending on what state or part of the country you are in but for the sake of argument let's say....14, you are excused from this because: a) you know no better, and b) you are probably forced to partake by either or both of your parents. However, anyone older than that, it is you I have a problem with.
I have no problem with you treating your Mom special. Hell, she deserves it for having to put you with all your crap when you were younger. Both the literal crap she had to clear from all of your orifices as well as the bathroom floors and walls when you thought pooping was a full contact sport. Also the verbal, emotional crap you put her through as a teenager when you thought you one everything but you really didn't know shit (and if you are being honest, still don't). No, by all means, treat her special but do it amongst yourselves, not where the rest of us have to suffer through it. I am tired of seeing my Facebook, twitter, or any other social media taken up with you false sentiment. Some of us have lost our Moms and DO NOT look forward to Mother's Day, we would just rather get through it and move on.
And if we are being honest amongst ourselves, you should be showing your Mother this kind of sentiment and appreciation EVERY SINGLE fucking day of the year. We shouldn't need a day set aside to do that. Yes, it is nice that we do have such a day, but the problem is -- like charity and taking care of your fellow man, or treating everyone you come across with respect -- once you designate a certain day (or agency to provide charity) to acknowledge someone or certain group then we only do it on that one day. I am sure most Mothers would rather you call them every day or at least once a week to see how they are doing. I am sure they would rather you take them out to dinner at least once a month, or to receive flowers or a card at least once a month (if not every few weeks) that say "Just thinking of you Mom and wanted to say how much I love you". But nooooo, we consider ourselves good children if we treat he that way on Mothers Day.
Now, your mom being the angel she is, will not tell you this -- that is left up to assholes like me. Instead she probably says that she doesn't need it everyday. That she knows you love her, you don't need to say it, etc. But I am telling you, she is lying. She wants to hear it everyday, she needs to hear it everyday, she deserves to hear it everyday. SO get off your ass and feeling like a good offspring for making Mother's Day special and make EVERYDAY Mother's Day. And while you do that, don't force the rest of us to remember the fact that we miss our moms, that we no longer have our moms around, and that we can no longer make up to our moms that we were rude, self-conscious, arrogant assholes. I beat myself up enough over that fact, I don't need or appreciate you reminding me, intentional or not.
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